Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Aretha Franklin sang it best, "RESPECT"

The Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin, sang it best "R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Find out what it means to me" It’s all we’re asking for, just a little bit…
Each of us deserves respect. Equally we need to show respect.We deserve respect from and need to respect our family members, children, pets, friends, co-workers, classmates, neighbors, and even strangers around us. Just as important, we deserve respect from the person we care about and want to spend most of our time with. 

Name calling is downright childish, so don’t do it. But I’m not only talking about actual words we exchange, rather the non-verbal’s, face time, and how we genuinely care about people are just a few examples of how to Respect others. You don’t know what a person does on their own time, and their daily challenges, so where do people think it’s ok to be disrespectful, judge and make assumptions?

So let’s break it down, what does respect mean to YOU? Define it for yourself, and be sure to communicate it to others in your circle. Tone of voice, language and vocabulary are the simple elements. Respect goes much further than the verbal communication.

Respect yourself and the other person to pick up the phone occasionally rather than text all the time. Respect others by arriving on time to engagements. Respect the other person by spending time with their friends and family while also inviting/expecting the same with your friends and family. If you’re in a relationship, this could be a rather simple yet important gesture. Why does that have to be “too much too soon?”

Respect yourself and the other person physically. Don’t rush into intimacy when you’re trying to get to know the other person on a more intellectual, emotional and personal level. However, we are all adults and intimacy is important, so this should be a mutual decision made by both parties. If/when you take that step, communicate your expectations before and after.

Respect someone's space. While we all enjoy interacting with those closest to us, we all need a little space to ourselves. Respect someone's environment. Whether you are at their home, in their car, with their family/friends or out in public with them, be respectful of that person's actions and interactions.  

Respect is the most important expectation to have and to deliver. Hand-in-hand with respect should be honesty. Why are people so afraid to speak the truth and share information and thoughts? You don’t have to “protect” the other person by refraining from speaking the truth. We are all adults, and can protect ourselves.

Just be open and honest with the other person about the things you like, things that you don’t like, things that inspire and motivate you to be a better partner, and the things that frustrate you or that you struggle with. Be honest about where you go and who you associate with. We certainly are not here on this earth to follow your life itinerary because we have better things to do and our own life to live. If we wanted a GPS tracker on you, then we’d use the “Find Friends” App, or hire a personal spy. #Creeper

But because we are genuinely interested in each other and your hobbies, we would love to learn more about the things you participate in and integrate ourselves somehow. You don’t need to over share or willingly tell us BS stories, but you also don’t need to twist the truth either. Most importantly about being honest is to share how you think/feel about the other person. Do you see this going anywhere? Do you like him/her? Did you start out on an interested mindset, but somewhere along the line it shifted? TELL them. We would rather hear it directly if he/she is interested in us than to see the communication/texting trickle off slowly or to just see an abrupt end to spending time with one another. 

Sometimes we all need to revert back to the basic fundamentals of Life. Like Aretha sang, "R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it means to me." Respect yourself and those around you if you expect Respect from others. Define it for YOU, and remember to stand by what you preach.